Life is good
My blogspot homepage is in chinese. WTF. I have no idea why its in chinese. I can't even read the chinese to know how to change it back. Oh well. I think it has something to do with the fact that i'm using my sister's laptop.. Hey i just realised something. I'm a touch-typer, which implies a certain level of typing proficiency (i.e. freakin' fast, baby!), and with this toshiba laptop, i can type even faster! Weird. I usually get stuck on laptop keyboards.
Well. Life is pretty good right now. My sister is in Sydney on vacation for the week, so I've got her condo and a set of wheels for my personal use! And boy am I enjoying it. Its all peace and quiet over here, all alone in the house.. Cooking my own meals, doing whatever I want, reading, listening to jazz, watching the Godfather over and over and over again..
Blardy shiok, man. Thank heavens for my super-cool, super-nice sis.
Not that I've really had a chance to do all that yet, cos I've had friends over yest and today. Which is even better, actually. Can do whatever the hell we want without really worrying about bothering people. And its especially cool when the pad is as great as my sister's.
Well, I'm off to read a good book now, lying on an uber-comfy goosedown couch, while the dulcet tones of Diana Krall thru a Bose sound system plays in the background.
Ahh, life is good.
(On a side note, my MC has been extended to 31st Jan. And I can walk now! Still some continuous pain, especially during rainy days, and I'm not comfortable with walking around without my ankle brace, but boy do i treasure mobility now! And it helps that I can drive too =) Thankfully driving actions for your ankle are all up down, not left right!)
Merry Christmas!!!
I do like christmas.
And a big reason is the eats, baby.
Heres the menu at the Tan House: roast turkey with cranberry sauce and pumpkin stuffing, side of beef with boiled baby lettuce with carrots, pig trotters, honey baked ham, caeser's salad, spaghetti and mushrooms.. ooh.
So I'll be eating leftovers for the next few days. What of it?
A feed like that only comes once a year, baby.
Hell, I don't even mind the fact that I'm spending christmas staying at home watching tv alone cos I've got nowhere to go. Nowhere I wanna go enough that i'd brave the mad crowds for anyway.
So. Happy holidays!!!
(Late addition: I ended up spending Christmas eve, till Christmas morning in fact, discussing business at a friend's place. Is that cool or what? While everyone was partying away, downing eggnog, fooling around in front of the fireplace, or whatever, we were working! Too cool.)
A dash of melancholy @ Christmas
Something about the holidays tends to bring me down.
Part of it is slight unease and celebrating a foreign holiday that basically has nothing to do with my race, religion or culture.
Part of it is stress, from having to buy presents, from the crowds clogging every shopping mall, from having to buy presents with crowds clogging every shopping mall..
And I suppose when everyone is all so happy and chumming with loves, friends and family, it just kind of especially sucks to feel alone.
Holidays are the loneliest times.
On the flipside though, I do enjoy christmas. The whole spirit of giving thing is, i think, very commendable.
Although I tell you sometimes its damn hard to try and be giving and generous when you're not really appreciated and taken for granted.
And I like christmas carols. They make me happy. All so chirpy and lighthearted. Its like believing that there will be a rainbow when the sun rises tomorrow.
On a side note, Mambo night @ zouk sucks. The crowd is insane. Do not go there if you value life, limb, or sanity.
We should take it personally
A friend recently sent me the url of an interesting site:The Religion of Peace.
I was going to write about how religion, apathy and violence seem to be inexorably linked. How the downward spiral of humanity, as evidenced in recent (and somewhat less recent) events, can be laid at the feet of what i consider to be one of the most beautiful aspects of the human spirit: Faith.
But I won't, because religion is a touchy subject. I'm not out to offend. I believe wholeheartedly that most religions are divine, wholesome and perfect in essense, and that all corruption lies in its practice by demented individuals (or groups, for that matter).
Especially since I don't deny that I do bear quite a bit of "righteous fury" towards those abovementioned practitioners (read: nutters) and I fear any discussion on my part will descend to a name-bashing tirade.
This is partly because I hate the way religions are run like money-grubbing capitalist conglomerates (I won't go into it, i promise). But nowadays also because every time I grab the papers and read about yet another bombing somewhere in the world, I take it personally. I suppose if I've gained anything from my NS vocation, its greater awareness and concern towards terrorism.
Admittedly, not all bombings are a result of a religious conflict. But by far the majority, as evidenced by, well, all the bombings reported on the papers, are because of some (desperately keeping myself from swearing here) fundamentalist radicals.
Since when was the killing of innocents justifiable, for any reason whatsoever? Any reason whatsoever. I believe that nothing short of God's will (or the will of a supreme being or fate or chance for that matter) should be allowed to take innocent lives. Nothing less than an Act of God.
All killers of innocents should die a horrible death in the tower of ravens. Or something equally vicious and painful. As a punishment and deterrent. Quick execution is too merciful for such scum.
Any crime against innocents is a crime that could have affected any one of us. I don't doubt that prior to 9/11, New Yorkers were apathetic towards terrorism. As amply demonstrated by various documentaries, they sure aren't now. But is that what it takes, before the masses start taking terrorism seriously? Taking it as the personal attack it is?
Terrorists, may they burn in hell, still persist in their chosen career because what they do makes a difference to them. They have publicity, at any rate. Their work keeps them busy, makes them feel needed, martyrs even. And it keeps them financed, so their wives and daughters have food on the table, I suppose. (Notice how I make no mention of terrorists trying to save their eternal souls or other such religious twaddle, because, I say again, not all terrorists work for religion.) And still, they don't face the widespread condemnation they deserve. Sure, world leaders rightly condemn terrorism. But to the common man, unless hes been affected by terrorism, it probably still feels a world away.
Its long past time to take it seriously. I mean, those in the know have been trying to spread the word for years, but most people really honestly don't seem to care. I'm betting if 99.9% of the world population was against terrorism, the 0.1% of terrorist sympathisers wouldn't dare to do shit.
This isn't a tirade against religions that spawn terrorists. This is a tirade against terrorists of any faith, race, nationality or colour.
I simply completely fail to understand why such subhuman trash could possibly exist. Or why they're allowed to exist, anyway.
Maybe just to show us that the world isn't a perfect place and isn't meant to be.
Or its a sickness of the human race that'll bring the rest of us down into oblivion.
Whatever. If wanton terrorism continues, I don't see how the future could be anything but bleak.
Is it morning already, ma?
I got up super early this morning. Super-early for these stuck at home days, that is.. cos I've got a physio appointment in the morn. So now I'm home from the hospital, its 2pm, and i feel like the day is nearly done.. mainly cos I've been awake the usual amount of hours it'd take for me to hit sundown =P
Hmm I think this blog is essentially one long gripe (or whine) about being stuck at home. Oh well.
Anyway I was watching some MTVs just now. I think that Joss Stone is a cleaned up, more sensitive version of Christina Aguilera. Voice-wise, at least. They both have these big brassy yet delicate voices with a strong funky vibe. At least, thats how it is for the songs I like.. Man, if i ever meet a girl who can sing like that.. Well.
Anyone remember the "Genie in a Bottle" mtv? Christina was actually quite pretty there! But the song hardly showcased her vocal talents. She looks pretty skanky now though.. man. Whats with the Marilyn Monroe platinum-blonde do? Jeez.
P.S. I checked the dictionary.. All those word variations on ruminate actually exist! Shocking, the english language is. Anyway, I'm over hash now. Right now, I'd really like an egg buffet though. Y'know, one of those buffets with eggs prepared any way you like, poached, fried, omelette, scrambled, benedict, etc. etc. Eggs is the new hash.
Further ruminations
I think I just invented a new word. Anyway. I decided I should write down what else I ruminated (Ding! Word invention point!) today. In case I decide to re-ruminate what i ruminated on.
Note: I apologise to all cattle, cow-farmers and bovine-scientists (and linguists, come to think of it) for my mangling of the usage of "rumination"
Anyway. Filial piety! The importance of filial piety cannot be underestimated and hash is yummy hash is good so colourful fried tasty tasty mmm.
And christmas! I like christmas. Gift exchanging and all that. Do you send christmas cards? I try to, but I always forget. If everyone is poor should you still get christmas presents for everyone? Or will you just embarass them because they didn't have sufficient fiscal abundance to get you one too? Christmas is about giving though, isn't it? Do they serve hash at christmas? I miss hash.
Theres this Scandinavian restaurant above Borders at Wheelock place. I think its called "Skal", with an umlaut above the "a". I think. It has nice hash.
Okay I shall cease ruminating. Hash has filled my brain.
Ruminating
Today, I spent more time than usual thinking. I'm talking about really sitting down and just thinking things through.. Mostly things I've rush-thought through before but never properly considered. So I thought. And thought. Kinda like a cow chewing on cud. Thats when I decided that my brain has officially turned into mush.
Its not moving! My brain is not functioning. The cogs are stuck, the wheels are jammed, the enzymes digested. When I try and think, I feel like theres this big mechanical arm in my head swinging *bonk bonk bonk* repeatedly against a pillar.
See what happens when you don't use something for too long? Can't even properly control what I think about now.
In fact, my brain is currently still fixated on the word "mush" i used at the end of the first paragraph. I keep having flashes of ice floes and billowing snow and fur-wrapped eskimos racing in dog sleighs.
Reading a lot is one thing. Trying to get my head to process what I've read is another. Constant struggle. At this read I'm going to be slaughtered in university.
I just got a new TV. Swapped my old 21-inch TV for a new 21-inch TV. Which is bigger and heavier. Funny I kinda thought the way technology progresses would make the electronics in TV's smaller, so you can have a smaller lighter TV, even though its just CRT.
I suppose right now if I asked Toshiba they'd say something about how its bigger cos the quality is better brighter richer sweeter sinful like Godiva's chocolates. Well, whatever. I mean, the bloody thing has games in it. Like jackpot and moles and crap. I'm sure I'm going to sit in front of the TV for hours every day playing TV-jackpot when I have a perfectly good and gorgeous Xbox sitting right beneath the TV.
Oh damn. Now, my brain is stuck on hash. Mush reminded me of mash, as in mashed potatos. Which in turn reminded me of hash, which is yummy and i very much like to eat. Which I saw being cooked on the Surreal Gourmet yesterday. Hash. Hash. Hash. Its like a bloody cracked record in my head.
Mmm I'd really like some hash now. Where can I find good hash? I'm lazy to cook. (Yeah i know its easy to cook. But I'm lazy.)
Anyway. One of the things I was trying to think about today was, whats the benefits of studying overseas? I'm talking about the intangible benefits, aside from a possibly better education and a more flamboyantly titled degree.
Lets see. You get to experience a foreign culture. Thats got to be a big plus, I suppose. The whole broadening your outlook thing.
Okay I'm stuck. My brain just keeps screaming "Hash! Hash! Hashhashashashhashashash!!!"
Contributions, anyone?
Super-mess!
My room is a bloody disaster area. Its totally incredibly completely messy. How the hell did one guy accumulate so much junk?
Enough books to equal a forest, files from primary school, old computer games, outdated magazines, empty wine bottles, uncompleted arts and craft projects, souveniors from holidays or school trips or ex-girlfriends, heavy metal weights, musical instruments and stands, assorted sports equipment, enough clothes to fill the salvation army's annual quota.. man.
Disaster area.
And its so damn hard to do something about it. I clean up an area, then the junk just accumulates and accumulates and its messy again.
I just bought a TV shelf for my TV (duh) and now my floor space is even more limited. On top of that, all the wiring and cables is a bloody huge mess. I think I've got 12 plugs plugged into one power socket. And if you include the audio/visual cables, printer cables, ethernet cables etc. etc. there must be about 30 wires running all over. What a bloody mess.
And I've got this huge king sized mattress leaning against a wall in my room blocking out half the windows (and daylight). Good thing I don't particularly like daylight. Or any bright light, for that matter.
Disaster area.
HELP!!!
Next stage of recovery
The cast is off. Actually it came off yesterday, but I was having problems with blogger so no new entry. Well, the leg feels considerably more unstable without the cast supporting, understandably. So I guess the recovery is not as good as I imagined!
Not to mention that after being in a cast for about 7 weeks, my right foot, especially the surgical site, looks like its decomposing. Its disgusting. I'd put on some photos of it I took, except that looking at them made me feel sick. And its -my- leg. So in the interest of the more delicate friends of mine, no photos! Just some vibrant imagery: Cracking skin sloughing off, congealed blood lining the scar, dried pus caked around, dark patches from bleeding within the cast.
Tasty! Whats for dinner?
Anyway I'm looking forward to mobility again! Looking forward to seeing the outside world for substantial periods of time!! (i.e. more than 2 hours, preferably not hospitals.)
Do hospitals make you feel sick? They sure make me feel kind of sick, as in ill. I think its some kind of mild hypochondria brought on by empathy. Like when I went to the diabetic centre at CGH to pick up an ankle brace (their podiatry centre is located within the diabetic centre). As I sat waiting for the nurse, surrounded by diabetics (whom i felt extremely bad for), I could've sworn my pancreas start going haywire (touch wood).
Its like Jack Nicholson in the film "One flew over the cuckoo's nest". Staying in a mental hospital, even if you're perfectly sane, can probably make you go cuckoo.
Anyway, I'll be purchasing some Live Strong wristbands from the Lance Armstrong Foundation. They go for USD$1 each, in packs of ten. I intend to order one pack, but the shipping cost is USD$11.50 for a few packs, I'm not sure exactly how many. I feel kind of silly paying USD$11.50 for USD$10 worth of charity. So if anyone else wants to order some Live Strong armbands soon (and I mean really soon, I'm not a patient guy) please tell me immediately, preferably by phone, so we can place the order together. Of course, I'll be glad to pay the full shipping charge. I just don't want to feel like I'm lining the coffers of our postal service more than I'm donating to charity.
Faith in love
Just had this most outstanding meal and this chinese restaurant! There was a lobster salad, sharks fin, roast suckling pig, fresh-caught changi pomfret, abalone with mushrooms, fish maw and dumplings... mmm. Fantastic! The food was delicately prepared and very well seasoned.
The restaurant itself is very simple, practically zilch on ambience.. its at the bottom of a HDB block, only half of it is air-conditioned, quite spartan in decor. But the service is fast, polite, dedicated.
Only downside is, its a bit pricey. 8 adults and 2 kids was $500 plus (don't ask me about the breakdown, the receipt just said "dinner"), but on the other hand, for such excellent food, its worth every penny.
I suppose that just goes to show how good the food is. I mean, we've spent less at places way more posh and felt totally ripped off.
Please! Try it!
Chin Lee Restaurant
Blk 115 #01-285
Bedok North Road
S(460115)
No idea if its famous, but theres quite a lot of newspaper clippings and those "Singapores Best Eateries" type award posters around.
But, great food! What more do you need?
Anyway the dinner was to celebrate my parent's 36th wedding anniversary!
36 years.. thats a very long time, I think. If I've learnt something from my parents relationship, is the importantance of patience, tolerance, faith, trust, and giving.
Today I was talking to a close friend of mine who seems to have lost faith in guys in general. Quite the fad now, I think. After all, guys are jerks, whats there to like? She even (laughingly, I'd like to think) suggested that she'd like an exciting guy to have a fling with. Because flings are fun without all the relationship problems and stress. Because, after all, guys are ruled by their "you-know-whats".
More and more of my friends now no longer think they'll get married, nor will they want to have kids that'll grow up in a broken family. This callousness is not surprising, I suppose, considering the oft-quoted statistic of the rate of marriages being only twice that of the rate of divorce.
More and more people lose hope of ever finding the right partner to spend the rest of their lives with. I mean, its a scary thought. Even a pro-relationship guy like me can't really imagine being with the same person for the next 60 or so years.
I suppose thats where the tolerance and faith and patience et al come in. You just do the best you can with the person you're most mutually attracted to. Every relationship has problems, after all. Differences in personalities are bound to cause sparks, but thats what makes relationships interesting, right? But the tolerance etc. is what gets you through, when the weaker relationships are filing for divorce as the children cry on the streets.
Maybe I'm being melodramatic, but one thing I've always felt strongly for is that whenever possible, unhappy couples should still stay together for the kids. I don't think its fair for the children. You wanted the children to be born, so don't you shirk the responsibility.
But anyway, I still believe that its possible to find a good long term partner. As long as both of you are mature individuals and know what you want out of and what you can provide for the relationship, nothing will come up that can't be resolved. Besides, sometimes love takes time.
Love at first sight, being struck by the thunderbolt, hearing bells when you kiss your true lover, that only happens in romance novels.
I suppose love must be nurtured. Some say grown out of friendship. Well, whatever works for you. Sometimes love must be put on hold because the lovers aren't emotionally equipped yet. Sometimes you outgrow love.
But still, you have faith that one day you'll find love. Or (at least I think so) life will just be less meaningful in the long run. I just want, when on my deathbed, to look back on my life and think "I've led a good life". So, I still have faith.
Perhaps I'm still too young, too naive, perhaps I'll understand better ten years down the road. But I know that my parents are happy. That when their 50th anniversary rolls around I'll want to throw a second wedding dinner for them. If for nothing else, just to celebrate that love need not always die or fade away.
Thus, thanks to them, I still have faith.
p.s. Don't mind the long rambling entry. I don't write too coherently when I'm tired but can't sleep cos of a full gut. That doesn't however mean I don't believe in what I write. Because I do. And please, no "Who's Faith?" jokes. Though come to think of it Faith Tan would be a pretty name.. *muses*
